so me and my dad are watching a documentary about a man that killed his children and the presenter turned to the camera and said ‘how could anyone ever think about killing their child’ and my dad sat there looking straight at the tv and said ‘trust me its not difficult’ he then looked at me and sighed
(Source: awkwardvagina, via my-beautifulmistake)+
remember when the avengers was new?
remember how exciting it was to finally have some of our favorite superheros interacting in one movie?
remember getting chills during this scene?
remember feeling like a superhero when the screen went black and the credit music came on?
Please never forget how special The Avengers is.
today i saw a scene couple in the hallway at school and the girl literally stopped kissing him so she could scratch his face and meow into his ear and he barked back i do not pay taxes for this shit
this post just doesnt sit well w/ me like who cares who cares how people interact w/ each other or show affection if it makes them happy to do that wtf
i feel like u haven’t been through enough public school
Next time a blocked number calls you answer like this: “Jim’s whore house. You got the dough, we got the hoe.”
Why does this not have any notes?
lol no “Nashville sperm bank, you squeeze it we freeze it. how may I help you?”
“Henderson’s Morgue, you stab em, we slab em, this is Eight Ball speaking.”
“Texas crematorium you kill ‘em we grill ‘em how can I direct your call?”
when your alarm goes off on a saturday
Having a cute waiter like I’ll have the chicken with a side of that dick
ooh a friendship bracelet!!! oh my it’s silver, you really shouldn’t have. wait uh it’s a little tight
"you’re under arrest sir"
I hope you fall in love with a man with good music taste and a jawline stronger than your wifi connection
im glad i dont have a thigh gap i almost dropped my phone into the toilet but i caught it with thunder and lightning